it was mom.

today i have been able to reflect on the wonderful opportunity that is motherhood. my journey towards becoming a mother is inching ever closer and each day i am lost in thought at what this new life and adventure will be like when i have a child to call my own.

for as long as i can remember, i have wanted nothing more than to be a mother. it is something that i know that i was born to do and will be good at. i know that it will be the hardest thing that i will ever have to do, but it will also give me the most satisfaction and happiness. 

the past several years of my life have been scary and challenging health-wise. there was a point when i thought that i'd get to the point in my life where i wanted to have children but i wouldn't be able to. i have gotten very used to my body doing the exact opposite of what it was designed to do. when the impression came to me that this was something that needed to happen now, it seemed so far-fetched and unattainable.

from the moment i found out that i was pregnant, i knew that my life would never be the same. i worried so much with each passing day that this life that had started to grow within me could possibly be taken away at any moment. i did and continue to do everything within my power to make sure the little life that has been entrusted to Taylor and I would be as healthy as he could possibly be. 

the fact that this nine month journey is going to end with a child of my own being placed in my arms has hit me a little at a time. the full magnitude of the responsibility and blessing that is motherhood has not resonated with me yet, and i know it won't be until that moment when i am looking upon my son's face that i truly understand. 

with each passing day of carrying him close to my heart, i am continually amazed at how i can love someone who i've not even met yet so much. i know that motherhood can often be looked down upon and seen as something that is wasting freedom, time, and youth. but think- where would you be without your mother? this is a calling in my life that i know will take every ounce of my strength, patience and wit. and yet, i could not be more thrilled or excited to meet the little boy that will change my life forever.