32 weeks- 8 months!

i am now 8 months pregnant! 

holy cow.

how did this even happen?? time is going by so fast. i feel like some days drag, but then i look at the countdown on my phone that says my little boy will be here in 47 days and my heart explodes a little. 

at 32 weeks...

my baby bump has gotten so big. it's nuts. just last night, tay and i were going through some of the pictures on my phone that had been taken of my belly. i haven't been as good as i've wanted to by taking a picture every week (which i'm sure i'll regret maybe) but i have got a few that show some pretty crazy progress. he told me to find the first picture that i had taken of the "bump". looking at it now, it blows my mind! there's hardly anything there. but to taylor and i, it seemed like such huge progress. i was so excited to watch my tummy grow and know that my body would be able to support and house our child for the next nine (ten) months. it's crazy how your perception of what "huge" is changes...ha. 

this was the first picture i took at 13 weeks. 

i have now started going into the OB office twice a week. yep, a week. it's a little insane. scheduling that around my current work schedule was a little tedious, but i got it all worked out nicely. so from now until baby J comes, i will be going in every tuesday afternoon and friday morning for non-stress tests and fluid level monitoring. the non-stress test is pretty boring (so i was told), but i actually kind of enjoy it. they put two monitors on my tummy- one up higher and one down lower. the top one measures contractions and the bottom keeps track of his heart rate. over the course of twenty minutes, they are looking for his heart rate to spike about 15 beats above his average rate and hold it there for about 15 seconds. usually, when a baby moves, their heart rate will spike. so we try to get him moving. apparently babies at the current week i am at aren't very cooperative with movement, but our little boy is quite the active one and has completed the tests pretty fast both times. the other monitor will show on a graph if i have a contraction. a couple times i had a "braxton hicks" contraction and i could see the little graph spike and go back down. it's kinda cool to watch what's happening inside my body.

i had an ultrasound in the office for them to check my amniotic fluid level because they were worried it might be too high. (a normal range is anywhere from about 8 cm- 20 cm) mine was measuring at about 15.5 cm which is great! it felt good to know i don't have to worry about that right now. about a week ago, i had another visit at the hospital and got a more extensive ultrasound to see the baby. right now, he is measuring a few weeks big. he is supposed to be around 3 and a half pounds right now...and our little man is about 4 pounds and 11 ounces! it had me a little worried, but i asked the doctor about it and he said that still only puts him in the 75th percentile, so as long as his growth is consistent, i won't be giving birth to a 10 pound baby. thank goodness. :) he will definitely be a big boy, but i somewhat expected that, with the circumstances and also just genes. a healthy baby is the most important thing. 

at this point, after a conversation with a couple of my doctors, we can pretty much guarantee that he will be here on July 16th or the day after. to be induced to deliver "naturally" (not a c-section) i have to be at least 39 weeks if i don't have any signs of labor already. so July 16th will be that day! if i happen to go in the week before and i'm already dilated to 3cm, then they will let me be induced then! i want him to be healthy, but i'm sorta praying that he'll decide to come to the world a little sooner than later :)

as for me, i am currently...

super uncomfortable almost 24/7. having stinky back pain. waddling like a penguin. sporting cute swollen ankles. waking up literally every hour each night to pee. having numerous braxton hicks contractions. feeling baby boy move around like crazy: rolls, jabs in the hips and ribs (simultaneously), and powerful kicks. 

i am so excited to meet our little boy. i think about him all day long and dream about what he will look like and be like. i think about how much our lives will change with the addition of him into our family. i worry if i'll be a good enough mother for him. i worry if he is healthy and happy in the little home i am providing him with. i miss it when he doesn't power punch me for a while. i think about how i am never alone and how my sweet baby has become my constant companion and little buddy. i stare in awe at my growing belly and wonder how something so incredibly important and magnificent is happening in there. i am amazed every day at what my body is capable of doing and how this awesome journey that has been the hardest thing i've ever done will end with a baby being placed in my arms. 

i can't wait.

the best is yet to come. 

it was mom.

today i have been able to reflect on the wonderful opportunity that is motherhood. my journey towards becoming a mother is inching ever closer and each day i am lost in thought at what this new life and adventure will be like when i have a child to call my own.

for as long as i can remember, i have wanted nothing more than to be a mother. it is something that i know that i was born to do and will be good at. i know that it will be the hardest thing that i will ever have to do, but it will also give me the most satisfaction and happiness. 

the past several years of my life have been scary and challenging health-wise. there was a point when i thought that i'd get to the point in my life where i wanted to have children but i wouldn't be able to. i have gotten very used to my body doing the exact opposite of what it was designed to do. when the impression came to me that this was something that needed to happen now, it seemed so far-fetched and unattainable.

from the moment i found out that i was pregnant, i knew that my life would never be the same. i worried so much with each passing day that this life that had started to grow within me could possibly be taken away at any moment. i did and continue to do everything within my power to make sure the little life that has been entrusted to Taylor and I would be as healthy as he could possibly be. 

the fact that this nine month journey is going to end with a child of my own being placed in my arms has hit me a little at a time. the full magnitude of the responsibility and blessing that is motherhood has not resonated with me yet, and i know it won't be until that moment when i am looking upon my son's face that i truly understand. 

with each passing day of carrying him close to my heart, i am continually amazed at how i can love someone who i've not even met yet so much. i know that motherhood can often be looked down upon and seen as something that is wasting freedom, time, and youth. but think- where would you be without your mother? this is a calling in my life that i know will take every ounce of my strength, patience and wit. and yet, i could not be more thrilled or excited to meet the little boy that will change my life forever. 

29 weeks!

long time, no update!
it's been pretty busy here around the Jeffery household.

both Taylor and I had our last week of classes and finals within the last few weeks. i finished a week earlier than him since i go to BYU and he goes to UVU. but now that we are both done i feel SO much relief. finals week is never fun. but add that onto a work schedule and being pregnant and it just takes on a new meaning. and stress is never good for you- and especially not for a growing baby! so i'm glad it's over. and i pulled out with pretty good grades, especially when i take into account how crappy i felt at the beginning of the semester. ...let's just say i missed a lot of class. but! i qualified for a half tuition academic scholarship that i will be able to use when i'm full time next winter. so we are super grateful for that! and Tay did well too and is super excited about being able to spend more time at work...sounds funny, huh? but he LOVES his job and is so so good at it. (i like to brag on him) and his bosses love him. there's exciting possibilities for him in the future! we have been really blessed.

ok, on to baby news.

29 weeks! helloooooo huge bump.

almost 27 weeks.

 I am now 29 weeks (and 1 day) pregnant!
that means we are officially in the third trimester as of last week. so it's a downhill race from here! and hopefully it's a quick race because i am starting to get antsy.

baby boy is now the size of a winter squash/butternut squash/small cabbage. he is about 17 inches and 3 pounds. but i am always a little suspicious of the weight/length on these apps. we know that he is measuring a little bigger so i wouldn't be surprised if he was longer and a heavier as well.

basically, he is smarter, chubbier, more independent and extremely energetic at this point. technically, if he was to be born tomorrow he has a 95% chance of survival. i definitely want him to stay in there a lot longer than that though.

he moves like a crazy baby! i can feel him rolling around in there a lot. because he is getting bigger, the movement aren't really as frequent or small. they are usually pretty deliberate and big punches, kicks or rolls. he is probably running out of room! he has been getting the hiccups quite often now! it feels like an annoying little twitch on the inside that i can't rub out. i love all the moving though. it is so reassuring and will for sure be the number one thing i miss the most about being pregnant.

i had my 28 week check up last week and they were a little worried that he is growing too fast. i am measuring a little bigger than normal, and boy do i feel like my belly has exploded within the last few weeks. they said that i am retaining a lot of water and that is why my belly is growing faster and bigger than normal. i have a tiny bit of swelling in my lower legs and ankles, but that is normally not until the end of the day when i've been on my feet a lot. i realized that i am on my feet a lot, so i have been trying to elevate my little piggies and relax as much as i can. i get bored after a while though, so i end up back on my feet after a while. but lots of breaks are a necessity. the doctor was just worried about me getting preeclampsia (you can google it) so he told me to take as many precautions as possible. i had to come back just a week later, which was yesterday, and i saw the nurse practitioner and she made me feel a lot better. so for now, i am just doing everything in my power to keep this little baby in me as long as possible!

i go back to my OB in two weeks to get an ultrasound to measure the fluid levels around the baby and get my first non-stress test done. i will be getting those done twice a week starting at 32 weeks until i deliver! so i will let everyone know how exciting they are as soon as i've had one done.



in other news, it's SUMMER! this week has felt pretty cold and crummy but for the most part it has been beautiful here in happy little Provo/Orem.

i am just working full time right now until the end of Spring term (about June 20) and then it will be time to prepare for the baby's arrival! hopefully not sooner than that. the Spring time on campus is a lottttt slower, and the shifts are longer so i get bored a lot quicker. I've been trying to read a lot and plan out projects. i got a book from my sister in law Jamie called "The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy" and just had the chance to devote time to it since school is out. i finished it a few days ago- it was hilarious! and really enlightening on a few things. i've also continued my reading of the Harry Potter series and i really want to read the Divergent series and the Chronicles of Narnia sometime. good thing i have lots of time on my hands!


Tay and i have lots of projects planned for the summer and i can't wait to get started on them! just yesterday, i made a cute wreath for our door. i had been meaning to do it forever, and finally got around to getting it done. it was SO easy and i love how it turned out! we bought all the supplies to refurbish the dresser we found for so cheap at the DI. i am so excited to get started on it and make it look cute!



last weekend, i went to sunny St. George with a few of the girls i work with to go to our friend Whitney's wedding! we left early saturday morning and got breakfast at this cute place called the Bear Paw. i got french toast (that was stuffed) and it was incredible. i didn't quite finish it all but oh i would definitely get that again. so we had found a deal at a resort where we could pay as a "family" and get a day pass! so we laid by the pool and soaked up some rays and then got ready for the wedding in the facilities there. i put on 50 spf sunscreen no less than four times and still got burned! and i was the only one! ha. oh how i love being pale. but the wedding reception was to die for cute and Whitney looked so beautiful and happy! i'm so glad we got to go down.






the weekend before that, Tay and i went to another wedding! (it's wedding season here) and got to see my beautiful friend Kenzie, who was one of my suitemates my freshman year. her and Ryan met our freshman year and dated and then Ryan went to Cambodia on his mission and two years later he came home and really the rest is history. they are the perfect couple and i absolutely died seeing how beautiful and happy she was! two of us down, two to go! ;) (i'm obviously talking to you, Hill and Laura!)








we have gotten so many nice gifts for our little baby boy! we got a reallyyyyy awesome one that i will have to post about soon because i don't have a picture with it. BUT! it was my birthday a couple weeks ago and a little over a week ago i got the NICEST gift from one of my best girlfriends from highschool, Emily! it had all my favorite things in it and even some gifts for Baby J! he's gotta have a UT orange bib to represent his momma's roots! thank you Em!





yesterday was my sister Shayla's birthday. me, my mom and her went to this new little pizza place in Draper called Pizzeria Limone- it was SO good. we got a pizza that had basil, onions and blackberries and another one that was a caprese. SO yummy. she's the best sissy and i love her. so glad i could spend some time with her on her birthday. 






Taylor and I love grocery shopping. we have tried out a few places but Winco will always be our favorite. they have the BEST produce ever and they have everything that we buy cheaper than anywhere else. Tay absolutely loves going there. I like it because you can even buy things in bulk, like Costco. we don't really need things in bulk, but they do things like baking goods or rice or pasta, etc. and you just weigh it by the pound. it ends up being a lot cheaper. i love it.

we bought a smoothie maker after our little sister Jane convinced how awesome it was. i feel like homemade smoothies are either hit or miss, but i am learning how to make them better! i made one just today and it is SO good that i'm going to be one of those people and give you the recipe. ha!

mixed frozen fruit (blackberries, blueberries, raspberries)- as much as you want. i probably did 1/2 cup ish. 
two spoonfuls (or however much you want) of soy protein powder- got this at Winco!
vanilla coconut milk- (so so good, and good for you! just hard to drink a ton by itself) prob 1/2-1 cup.
handful of FRESH strawberries
handful of spinach. 


and blend! i just kept adding a little milk as i went till it blended well and got to the consistency that i liked. and it was the first smoothie i ever made with spinach! i was nervous about it but you can't even taste it. so yummy, i can't wait to make another!







and Taylor made us German pancakes a couple weeks ago- they were SO good and easy. we like to cook.












we are still happy, in love and excited for our boy to get here! keep us in your prayers please. we could use all the extra help we can get and we need to make sure Baby J stays put until it is time to come out!

here is a "throwback thursday" to make you smile. love my people. 

the best is yet to come.

26 weeks!

that's right! i am two thirds done with pregnancy!

i have missed a couple of weeks of updates, but not much has changed, except my ever growing belly and higher reaching numbers on the scale....(my least favorite part- ha!) but things have been so great!

at 26 weeks our baby boy:

is 14 inches long and about 1.7 pounds!

[that makes him about the length of a green onion, the size of a "hot house cucumber", or a papaya...take your pick ;) ]

he is becoming stronger and smarter every day! he is able to "practice" breathing with his ever-developing lungs and he can hear a lot better now! guess that makes listening to me and his daddy sing more pleasant...or unpleasant :) 

and he is becoming more opaque and chubbier... the chubbier, the snugglier!

i am feeling SO good! i have finally gotten to the point where i am really enjoying being pregnant, minus the few downsides that come along with the blessing. 

i am basically wearing skirts or dresses every single day because they are the comfiest. unless i am at home, in which case i will almost always be in sweatpants and a big baggy shirt. i recently got some cute maternity dresses and tops from some family and friends and i ordered a couple shorter stretchy skirts for summer! i love online sales. 

sleeping isn't so bad. it was a lot worse earlier on. but my pillow really helps! i have gotten used to the frequent trips to the bathroom in the middle of the night. i guess i should be thankful though because in a way it's preparing me for future nights with baby boy. 

i am so glad morning sickness isn't a thing for me anymore. i really have loved being able to handle pretty much whatever i want to eat. i get hungrier fast but i also get fuller quicker. i don't really have any food aversions that i can think of, but definitely have things i eat on a daily basis: cereal or oatmeal and yogurt for breakfast, PB&J with fruit and snacky things for lunch, and pretty much anything for dinner! we usually have a meat (chicken almost always) with a veggie and potato/rice side. i love cooking. and we have been doing it more so that we can actually have left overs to eat for lunch or dinner the next day! it's great.

baby boy is getting SO strong. his kicks are crazy! i love watching my belly move or even just feeling my hand pop up when it's resting on my tummy when he kicks. it's crazy! i love it. i used to try and prod my belly to get him to kick back and he'd never do it...until now! i think he is getting more squished every day so when i poke him, he doesn't like it. or maybe he thinks it's a game! either way, i enjoy it. i know that is the main thing i will miss about being pregnant. 

i normally would be so apprehensive about uploading a video of my tummy but i think it is way cool! it's a short video, but toward the right side by my belly button, you can see him kick!

managing my diabetes has still been hard, but i am getting better at it! my A1C has stayed low the entire pregnancy and i have been able to be really healthy during it all. it's truly been a blessing. this could be so much harder, so i find great relief in knowing that my hard work is paying off. i've had a lot of labs done and they said that everything looks great! we go in this week to the hospital for another extensive ultrasound...i'm so excited! it's been 6 weeks since we've seen our boy so i can't wait!

in other news:

last week was my 22nd birthday! i was such a great day. i got my hair done in the morning- pretty differently done, too! i wanted to do an ombre for the longest time but was so nervous. i know a girl who does hair and is amazing, and so i figured since i wouldn't be doing anything the morning of my birthday, i should get it done! the results were just what i was wanting:

after that, taylor got off work early and we went to salt lake city creek center and walked the mall and hung out in the beautiful weather until about 7, then headed to murray to go to the cheesecake factory (one of my favorite restaurants)! it was so fun and yummy and i loved spending time with some of the people i love the most. i wish everyone could have come, but it was still a great birthday! i am really blessed! and this is going to be the biggest, most life-changing year yet!

the weekend before that was general conference! there were so many great talks that were given and we got to go down to my in-laws house in Glenwood for the whole weekend to spend time with them and listen to conference! i had been looking forward to this weekend for forever. school was getting stressful and it was just the weekend that taylor and i needed to recharge and just hang out. we had so many yummy meals and watched movies and played outside and hung out. and the whole family celebrated my birthday with me and got me such nice gifts! we even had two cakes, thanks to curt! haha. i got really lucky and blessed with my second family :) i'm pumped for summer when we will have free weekends to go spend with them whenever we can!

and this weekend is Easter! taylor and i are going to be spending it with my mom, shayla, quin and natalie. and we'll be having dinner at mine and taylor's apartment! (we moved to orem about two and a half months ago- one of these days when it's super clean i'll post pictures of it. but we LOVE it!) we are excited to see all of them!

AND best of all- classes are DONE-ZO! so happy. it's been a long and difficult semester trying to balance school, work, and morning sickness. luckily the last month and a half have been easier sickness wise. but a week from now when all of my finals are done- i'll be a free and joyous woman! summer is coming and so is baby boy and we could not be more thrilled!!

the best is yet to come. 

23 weeks!

sorry there was no update last week! it's hard to remember to do these things. but i am so glad i do. even if no one reads it, i love that i am able to record all of this so that i can look back on this time whenever i want!

as of yesterday, we are 23 weeks along!

23 weeks

22 weeks

22.5 weeks

my little mango/papaya/eggplant now weighs more than a pound and is just around a foot long. this week, his cerebrum, which is responsible for his memory, motor skills and intellect is developing more. he has begun to have REM (rapid eye movements) during his sleep. and his hair and skin are darkening! 

i have my 6 month/24 week check up next week and we will get to hear the heartbeat and maybe see how our little one is progressing! 

i have been sleeping so much better with my snoogle. it is magical. and this week i've had lots of opportunities to get extra sleep because my morning class was cancelled a couple times. i am very grateful for that. two weeks from this coming tuesday will be the last day of class and then just finals will be left. don't worry, i've got a research paper, a couple tests, and a book to read, and a few projects to do before then :) but i will prevail! i am so excited and anxious for summer. it is bringing with it a lot of new and exciting things! 

baby boy has been kicking like crazy and i LOVE it. i could sit for what feels like hours and just watch and feel him kick around inside my tummy. it makes me feel really close and bonded to him. taylor gets a little jealous because i get to spend so much time with him. but i told him because i have to go through the hard parts that it's my reward. :) taylor finally felt a kick! and got to see lots of kicks. i have this new bedtime ritual where i will shine our desk lamp towards my belly and watch him kick up a storm before we retire for the night. i've even recorded a couple videos on my phone so that i can watch the kicks whenever i please. it's my favorite part of being pregnant so far. 

i've been getting noticed more in public now and people will ask me when i'm due or what i'm having. i light up a little every time that happens. taylor told me last week the cutest thing. he said, "i love being with you in public and people knowing we are having a baby." he melts my heart. and i love having him with me, he makes me look good :) 

i also feel like, as a pregnant woman, that i maybe deserve a little more courtesy than i would get normally. i mean, mainly i am talking about...when i am walking through the cross walk, i expect you to slow down and not challenge me. i am pregnant. and don't walk quite as quickly as i used to. sheesh. my patience often wears thin. haha. 

my diabetes management is really difficult every day. my body is so unpredictable and i never really know how to manage it. it really is often a guessing game. i've developed "insulin resistance" which i can sum up in two words: it sucks. ha. but seriously it's been a trial and error learning experience. i give so much insulin nowadays and still will end up with high blood sugars. i go in for an appointment next week with my endocrinologist and i'm hoping that things aren't too bad. i just have to keep reminding myself that i'm doing everything i can. but it's hard. remember me and the baby in your prayers if you can :)

we have lots of exciting things to look forward to! doctor appointment next week, my birthday on the 10th!, going to Glenwood for a long weekend to spend time with our family there and watch general conference, being done with school, weddings and baby showers, SUMMER, and baby J!!! so so exciting, and time is flying!

the best is yet to come.  

21 weeks!

hello all! 

it's my "golden week" of pregnancy! 

(not a real thing but i'm pretending it is. i missed my golden birthday so i can have a golden week, right??)

this week marks 21 weeks of being pregnant!

in as few as 16 weeks our sweet boy could be here! when it gets closer to the time of delivery they will be checking on him pretty often so we will have my induction date when i am farther along.

this week, our little one is the size of a cantaloupe! holy cow! he is supposed to be about 12.7 oz. and 11 inches. however, i don't think the apps on my phone are very accurate when it comes to this. i had my 20 week check up and extensive ultrasound at the hospital and baby J was already about 12.5 ounces then! and they said that is very normal. there is no way for them to really measure the baby though because with the legs being squished up, it wouldn't be very accurate. so the 11 ish inches is probably pretty close to how long he is. (we have very tall genes on both sides of the family so i wouldn't be surprised if he's even bigger!) 

my hair is getting so long!

he now looks just about how he will look when he is born, just smaller :) at our appointment they checked all of his little parts to make sure they looked normal (and that they were there!) with being diabetic, they want to check his heart and spine especially to make sure it looks good! the appointment was the longest one we've ever had! (minus the time i thought i was going to throw up on my doctor and had to lay on the table for 30 minutes, ha.) it was so so so beyond cool to be able to see him for about 20 minutes moving around! his heart and spine look perfect from what they can tell! and he has all of his fingers and toes :)

i first felt him move around 15 weeks (i think) but nothing compared to what i've felt since then! about a week and a half ago i felt the movements with my hand on my belly for the first time! SO cool! other than that i just feel him occasionally kicking around in there. sometimes if i haven't felt him for like two hours or so i start to freak out. then he will give me a little kick to reassure me. :) i have attempted to have taylor feel the kicks by quickly putting his hand on my tummy if we are just relaxing, but whenever i do this, he stops moving! (that, or taylor zones out for a minute or two and doesn't feel it. haha.) it is difficult to feel them from the outside though, so i'll give him some credit. 

i have been super duper extra tired. it's like some days i literally cannot function without closing my eyes for a period of time. and sleeping was getting evermore uncomfortable with my always growing belly. i was sleeping with a pillow in between my knees for quite a while and finally it just wasn't cutting it. i had heard about this pregnancy pillow called the "snoogle" and looked around for one. the ones they sell in the maternity stores are pretty dang expensive (for a pillow) and buying it online wasn't terribly expensive but still more than my liking. however, on our first trip to burlington coat factory, we found it for way cheaper than both those places! that place has quite a few hidden gems. since getting it my sleeping has improved quite a bit! i'll usually only get up to use the bathroom in the night (which is a regular thing, especially because i have a bad habit of drinking way too much water before i go to sleep. ha.)  but last night i didn't get up one time until the alarm went off (minus to flip sides every so often during the night) it was glorious!

i have my wonderful appetite back to full normality now! ah it's heaven. i've even been able to cook for my sweetie and i again. i hadn't cooked in a long time because smells were just too much to handle. that, and i was just way tired. i've been able to get balanced meals in now and don't go too long without eating nowadays. tay loves to pack me a million things in my lunch as well. he's a good husband. :) oh, and let's just say this babe LOVES sweet things. he goes crazy when i have something sweet (especially those starburst jelly beans (easter candy, of course) holy cow!)

we have been the recipients of so much love and kindness! friends and family have already shown this little babe so much love and i can't even imagine what it will be like when he is actually here! we received a beautiful crib from my dad, and taylor set it up the very day it came while i was at work! i got some bedding (which is something i hated looking for- next time i am making my own!!) and we got it all set up! i am going to wait to post pictures of everything until the nursery is done. i have lots of things on my summer-crafting "to do" list. gotta stay busy! also on my "to do" list is registering for baby things... good thing i have super knowledgeable and organized sisters-in-law who have been there before (recently) and can help a sister out! oh! and we bought a car seat today! so so exciting! crazy to think that in four months our baby will be in it!


 

every day makes it one day closer to when he will be here! we are so thrilled!

 

the best has yet to come. 

i choose you.

one year ago on this day, my sweet boy told me the "three words" that changed forever what he would be to me.

i knew it was coming, because he had eluded to it earlier in the week. because we were dating long distance, i had to wait until saturday to see him in person. i had an entire week to think about the possibility of him loving me...and me loving him. it wasn't something that i had to think very long about.

i knew i loved him. i knew from the moment i met him that he was going to be different. i knew from the moment he told me, "if we keep this up i'm going to start falling for you," that i was already a goner. when i thought about my future, i knew that any possibility that didn't include him wasn't an option.

when we talked about our hopes and dreams, i realized i would never meet another person who would fit so perfectly with me. i would never be as happy as i am when i'm with him. sealing our marriage in the house of God was the best day of my life.

loving him has been the happiest and easiest thing i've ever done. being his wife has brought me so much joy. life is hard, but somehow with him by my side it doesn't seem so bad. my brain can't really comprehend 'eternity' but i can't wait for the weeks, months, and years ahead with my love, equal, other half and best friend.

let the bough break, let it come down crashing.
let the sun fade out to a dark sky.
i can't say i'd even notice it was absent-
cause i could live by the light in your eyes.

i'll unfold before you.
would have strung together-
the very first words of a lifelong love letter.

tell the world that we finally got it all right.
i choose you.
i will become yours and you will become mine.
i choose you.

there was a time when i would have believed them,
if they told me you could not come true.
just love's illusion.
but then you found me and everything changed.
and i believe in something again.

my whole heart will be yours forever.
this is a beautiful start to a lifelong love letter.

tell the world that we finally got it all right.
i choose you.
i will become yours and you will become mine.
i choose you.

we are not perfect, we'll learn from our mistakes.
and as long as it takes i will prove my love to you.

i am not scared of the elements.
i am under-prepared, but i am willing, and even better-
i get to be the other half of you.

tell the world that we finally got it all right.
i choose you.
i will become yours and you will become mine.
i choose you.

19 weeks!

nineteen weeks!

today i am 19 weeks along! that means that i am definitely halfway or more by this week! and as the weeks inch on by, i am feeling more and more pregnant every day. (mostly due to my size, ha.) when i tell people i'm halfway done, almost every person says something about how i don't look very big for being that far along. which is crazy because there are definitely days where i feel like a beached whale. 

our baby boy is the size of a grapefruit, heirloom tomato or a mango. (according to my various apps on my phone.) he is about half a foot long (from head to rump) and half a pound now! so exciting! in these next few weeks, his weight is going to increase "six-fold". yippee for a growing babe!

by now, he can sense light, taste, move around like crazy, and hear! so all of his necessary senses are starting to come together. he is developing a nice layer of baby fat that will make him extra cuddly when he makes his grand appearance. 

i am feeling great! i feel confident in saying that now, without the fear of it jinxing me. :) i am back to my normal appetite! (and it's ever-growing, as well) I can now eat all of my favorite fruits and vegetables! oh how i've missed that. don't worry, i still have a healthy craving for all my beloved favorite carbs as well ;) and this little boy of mine definitely has a taste for the sweet things. ice cream, brownies, pudding...you name it. maybe we won't be giving him very much sugar, as i'm afraid it might make him a little crazy.   

we are having so much fun thinking about our little boy every day. we don't have an official name picked out, but we like talking about different names that we like. we are making a list and going to look at it often so that we can find something that feels right. but we are most likely keeping it a secret! :) so come July, you will finally know. heck, we might not even know until then!

i love looking at little boy outfits. at first, i got a little discouraged because i felt like finding cute boy clothes that didn't have a truck or football on them was going to be next to impossible. but it is possible! it is dangerous to have me go to the store alone nowadays. luckily i've been able to be strong and not buy everything i set my eyes on. we've bought a couple cute things and also already received a couple things from family/friends! so nice and exciting! 

i've been looking at cribs, dressers, bedding, strollers...so much stuff. we are trying to find cute bedding online that isn't ridiculously expensive and isn't cheesy or silly. and by we i mostly mean me :) it'll take some thorough  research, that's for sure. but it's exciting! one daunting thing on my to do list: register for baby things....yikes. ha. 

we found out a few weeks ago that we are having a sweet little boy! we were surprised for sure (mostly me) but SO excited! i can't wait to have another sweet boy to call mine and for my darling taylor to have a little buddy to hang out with. here is the video from the gender ultrasound! 

it was so fun and exciting to finally see our sweet baby! (we had only had one ultrasound at 8 weeks and he mostly looked like a little peanut then) now he looks like a little baby! he was upside down in there and kicking and moving like crazy! it was surreal to watch him knowing he is growing in my tummy! 

the best has yet to come.

sixteen weeks!

in retrospect, this isn't the best outfit to show the bump. and i cut my head off because i am not having a good hair day. :)

today, we had our 16 week doctor's appointment. for the last two visits, we haven't had an ultrasound, but have been able to chat with the doctor about questions we have and update him on how i'm feeling and doing. and, of course, we got to hear our little one's heartbeat. today was the second time we've heard it. it is such an incredible thing! while we were listening, taylor exclaimed just that. "wow! that is incredible!" :) i loved seeing his cute face light up when we were listening to the heart for just a few seconds.

this is the video from our 12 week appointment where we heard the heartbeat for the first time. the heart rate was at 153 bpm this first time and today it was pretty consistent around 145 bpm.

today:

16 weeks along! that means i'm pretty close to half way there! being diabetic, they typically don't let the mothers carry the baby to full-term (40 weeks). so today i asked our doctor about that. he said that they will deliver anywhere from 37-39 weeks, but typically on the earlier side. so, i will make it to half-way sooner than twenty weeks! if the baby decides to come around 37 weeks, we could have a 4th of July babe!  

all of my pregnancy apps have finally agreed on a fruit/vegetable for this week. the baby is about the size of an avocado weighing in at 3.5 ounces and measuring at about 4.5 inches (crown to "rump" which doesn't include the baby's legs)! 

little one is pumping lots of blood each day- about 25 quarts! his or her bones are hardening and they can sense light with their little eyes, even though they will stay shut for a long time still.

i have been feeling so much better! on the whole, i am starting to feel more normal- thank goodness. i still definitely get nauseous, but usually a quick snack will fix that nowadays. i am still SO tired though. i joke with taylor that the very first thing i think of each morning before i get out of bed is "when am i going to be able to nap today?" haha. but seriously. the struggle is real. and i've unfortunately been getting up more frequently in the night to pee. they don't lie when they say that is a real problem! holy cow! haha. 

cravings are about the same. i definitely have more of an appetite now. which is great. i love baked potatoes (potatoes of any kind really), english egg muffins that taylor makes me, rice, and pasta, to name a few. mmm carbs. haha. 

i am pretty confident in saying that i think i have felt the baby move! the first time was last week. i can't feel the movements very often, because i have to be sitting or laying super still (and awake) to feel them. but sometimes i'll test it out and feel little flutters in my abdomen. so cool. 

the bump is ever-growing. maternity pants and maxi skirts and stretchy pants are my best friends. i have gained about 7 ish pounds so far. but i fluctuate a little every day.  i cannot wait till it gets warmer and school lets out and i can enjoy feeling pregnant more. hopefully the heat doesn't completely knock me out...ha.

we are finding out the gender of our sweet baby NEXT WEEK! on february 13th, which happens to be our 7 months wedding anniversary AND the day before Valentine's day. what could be a more perfect way to celebrate?? SO! everyone put your guesses in now! we will be revealing the result next week after we find out! so exciting!

please continue to pray and send positive thoughts our way! until next week!

the best is yet to come. 

Baby J

Life as we know it…is about to change!

On November 11, Taylor and I found out that we were expecting!

There were plenty of "Oh my gosh!!"'s, jumping up and down, "We're gonna have a baby!"'s,  and smiles that practically exploded off of our faces. 

Something I have learned since going public about our newest little addition is that no question is too personal…no matter who is doing the asking. Sometimes I get asked questions by unexpected people and all I can think is, “Man, when did we become best friends and decide to tell each other really personal things?” Now, this doesn’t happen ALL of the time, mostly people are just really, really excited for us and ask one or more of the three typical not-so-personal questions: 1. How are you feeling? 2. How far along are you? 3. Do you know the gender? People are so funny and predictable. Since I am finally sorta “showing” and people know about our little bundle of joy, I thought I’d take a page from my great friend Tessa Lund’s book and do periodic updates! There’s no telling how regular I will be able to make them, but I will do my best!

This week:

I am 15 weeks along!

Our tiny little babe is the size of an apple and measures at 4 inches and weighs in at just 2.5 ounces. Who knew something so tiny could ensue so much havoc on my body?! 

He or she now has all major reflexes and can even suck their tiny little thumb! Apparently there is a lot of “dancing” going on in there, but because the babe is so little right now, I won’t really be able to feel the force of the movements for another few weeks. Although, sometimes I swear I can feel something! Maybe it’s all in my head ;)

For about the past ten weeks or so I have been pretty darn sick. Curse you, morning sickness! (which really is literally ALL day sickness) They say that the sickly feelings will subside by the second trimester, but folks…we have been here two weeks in the second trimester and they’ve actually been worse. I’ll spare the lovely details- but we are keeping a positive face on towards the future! And I am praying that the war going on in my body will settle in the next couple weeks.

I have been super duper tired. I also have heard about this magical “boost” of energy that happens to show up in the second trimester as well….I’m looking forward to this immensely! Naps on the daily are a MUST. Whether they are planned/scheduled or not…they will happen. Haha. And a very early bed time of 10 or earlier is a standard. It’s kind of great.

I’ve progressed past the plain-cheerios-three-times-a-day and plain bagels with plain cream cheese diet to bigger and better things! I can now eat almost anything that I am hungry for. I have cravings for sweet things and really sour things the most. Sour lemonade is stocked in our fridge at all times. And the sour Strawberry Surf Rider smoothie at Jamba Juice is particularly wonderful. But the babe also loves things like….big burgers and French fries, pickles, chips and salsa, corn dogs, Taco Bell and dollar menu items at McDonalds…ha. Not the healthiest, but luckily most of those things don’t occur too often. :)

I hadn't had one of these since my freshman year! Mmmm.

Jamba. Strawberry Surfrider. Be still my soul. 

The hubby and I love our chips and salsa. The cheese was a special addition this time. Haha.

Red Robin is my FAVE burger restaurant.

Taylor made these. Cutie. Ate it together while we watched our fave- Harry Potter. ;)

I now am the proud owner of maternity jeans! Haha. It’s pretty funny, BUT seriously they are glorious. And pretty cute! They have a stretchy belly band, which my little bump isn’t quite big enough to fill out, so the pants are a little big. But the fact that there is no button or zipper is fantastic. I can still wear my regular jeans, but I didn’t think that unbuttoning them in public was socially acceptable. Most of my tops still fit because I tend to wear flowy-er things anyway.

So far we have had one ultrasound (8 weeks) and heard the heartbeat once (12 weeks). Both were amazing! And very nerve-wracking. But so far they said that everything looks great and we are very hopeful and excited! We have our 16 week appointment next week and then we’ll find out the gender soon after that! Boy or girl? Any predictions??  

I have a little growing bump! It's nice to have some proof that there really is something happening inside my body and I'm not just going through the ringer for nothing. Taylor will say on the daily, "Sweetie!! Look at your pregnant belly! There's a baby in there! Have you seen this? Feel it!" Haha. He will put a hand on my tummy and talk about the baby. It's pretty sweet. I've got a pretty great daddy-in-the-making on my hands.

8 weeks

13 weeks

15 weeks

Being a Type-1 Diabetic makes pregnancy a lot harder. They monitor me very closely and I see both of my doctors more frequently so that we can make sure that my blood sugars are excellent and always under control. I am always a worrier and think of all the things that could go wrong, but I know that I am doing everything in my power to make sure that I am healthy and that this will all work out!

Taylor and I could not be more excited to start our family. We have been so blessed through all of this and I truly know that this is the plan for our lives. Deciding to have children and start a family is such a personal matter, and I understand that more now. What could be greater than getting the opportunity to be a mother and a father to a perfect little soul? Nothing! We are so thankful to God each and every day. Keep our growing babe and family in your prayers!

Stay tuned!

The best is yet to come.